This U2 song came up on the radio late at night last night, and I just loved the song's name. Hence the blog title. It captures my feelings perfectly.
I've been researching about universities and master's programs in Sweden (and even Copenhagen business school in Denmark, they have an interesting program that combines business with language and culture, one of them even has some subjects taught in Japanese!) last night until 3 am and continuing until this afternoon.
The problem is, the majority of master's programs in business required some credits in business administration/economics/management/statistics, or a bachelor's degree on social sciences such as economics, law, etc.
But I don't have any. My undergraduate degree is bachelor of arts.
What to do ...
Even though I want to study in business field, I can't, because I'm not qualified? It made me disappointed.
So far I've found 2 programs that don't require business background. As for Stockholm school of economics (by the way, I was told this school is full of posh and snobbish Swedes, hmm..) general management master's program that doesn't require a bachelor's in business, it requires GMAT scores as I had mentioned in my previous post. I went to Kinokuniya and went through some GMAT books yesterday, but wasn't sure that I wanted to take this grueling 3 hour test experience. To be honest, the math part doesn't look too difficult, only I'll just have to learn some technical English terms in mathematics. In fact I'm pretty sure I've studied everything in junior high-school and high school, but the truth is I've forgotten all of them. Then I looked through the curriculum of this program more closely and found out that accounting, microeconomics, macroeconomics, statistics, finance are one of the subjects compulsory for the first year.
FINANCE? I think I'll die.
My best friend was being really encouraging and saying she's sure I can do it, but the more important question is, do I want to do it? The other friend also said she could tell by the way I look at GMAT books on the shelves that I clearly do not want to be involved in any of this, but more like I want to run away from it as fast as I can. She also tells me I should think more carefully about what I want to study, what genuinely interests me, and it doesn't have to be about business. I've got a feeling that she thinks business/management is not a right field for me. Because math is not exactly my strong point, she suggested marketing as it doesn't require a lot of math, but somehow I've never imagined myself as a marketing person...I'm not sure what is the perception about "marketing", but in my head it's like a person with creative ideas, always energetic, always showing off, confident in what they have to say, or...ok, in other words a person who can say a lot of bullshit to convince people (I'm truly sorry, all marketers out there...)
This friend of mine also said she's glad that things turned out well for me when I started working. She knew how much I felt lost after graduation, and just admitted that she was thinking I might turn into those students who can never adjust to working life and just want to go on studying.
WHAT. That was a shock. I was that horrible? Never imagined myself being that way. I knew I'll be fine with working and I'll get along and of course will get adjusted. The most important thing lies in whether I'll enjoy in what I do, which is more difficult.
I said there are a lot of Thai kids who just continue studying master's though they aren't interested in what they study at all, but study just because their parents want them too or because they don't wanna start working, more like studying just to kill some time. Then my friend asked me back "Do you see yourself as one of them? Are you one of those people?"
Definitely not.
I'll do more research. But most importantly, I need to ask myself more questions.
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